the part of life that i have always tried to avoid..... pain.

I just miss him. That's it. I really can't believe that I've lost him.

I love Jon with everything I have and my feelings for him aren't going to change, but I've learned that all I can do now is love him and pray for him.

This is a point in my life where I learn to trust God with my everything and believe that His plans are so much more brilliant than mine and that He will take care of me. Jon is the most amazing person than I have ever known and the memories I have with him keep consuming my mind. Like I've said... I didn't know it was possible to love and miss someone so much.

I have to focus on myself right now and live my life for me, but it's so hard to do when everything before was Jon.

I suppose, if you're reading this, please pray for me. I think I'm okay at times and then emptiness just hits me like a bag of bricks.